Manners matters

I know I've written about manners in the past, but that was about teaching manners to children.

This time, it's almost entirely different. This time, it's about the rarity of using manners as an adult.

In both my worst and best behaviours, I always show my appreciation towards acts and gestures that deserve to be acknowledged with due gratitude. I make sure that even in the worst tone of communication, I will still acknowledge the fact that the experience is something I am grateful for. Even if ties end and relations go sour, I always learn from both my mistakes and the mistakes of others before moving forward; out of respect and the sheer propriety in the fashion I was raised, I know that appreciation for ill-intended mishaps exists because of the learning experiences that the consequences of these situations have to offer. The appreciation is still due because it is a part of the events that have occurred in your life that make an impact on your future decisions and your future behaviours. Now because this is the way I grew up to respect every aspect of my life, I believe very strongly in the effect of having manners.

The thing I don't understand is that when I can look at people with whom I have existing issues, and still be grateful for their less than beneficial role in my life, I can't even get a damn coffee from the people running the drive through and hear a simple "Have a great day!"

My boyfriend and I have this issue all the time. We'll pull up to a Tim Horton's or McDonald's drive thru and get a "Can I take your order?" .... We RARELY get a "Hi welcome to *chain name*, how may I help you?"
I mean, after being immediately offended by the quick " Can I take your order?" As an instant reflex, we look back, only to see no cars behind us, we look through the window and see maybe one person in line at the front if any at all... and then we wonder why the hell it was so hard to take two extra seconds out of your day to at least say hi... It's not like you're in a rush so why do you speed through the conversation like having manners is an inefficient use of your time?

Human interaction is so limited nowadays, so I take my time to converse with every day labourers and service professionals when they're not busy. It may be bold to speak on behalf of my boyfriend, but I do believe that the times we go out together, we both enjoy speaking to cashiers, or customer service reps, or other service professionals who engage in conversation with us - so long as we're not holding up a line or causing distraction. The thing is, it's so rare nowadays to find pleasant and polite people like that, that when we do come across those people, its like finding a unicorn.
Saying please and thank you is a common courtesy and half the bloody idiots nowadays don't even have those two phrases in their vocabulary. Out of respect and genuine care, my boyfriend and I will ask people how their days are and the odd time they reply with a "not so good" or a brutally honest answer of that nature, we care enough to proceed with asking what's wrong because sometimes they just want to talk or vent. Sometimes people are just bored at work, but we never underestimate their position because I have found that the people who really want to engage in conversation with us, even if seemingly mundane at the time, are the ones who surprise us with having the most to teach us.

So going back to the issue of manners - both received from the workers in the public sector and the manners we use when we communicate with them - failure to have even the simplest of manners is a show of your effect on humanity. It says a lot about your respect for others, your respect for yourself, and whether you deserve much of any respect from others.

As I was saying about the tim Horton's; when my boyfriend buys me a coffee, after receiving the cup, he'll say thank you and wishes them a great day/evening/night. And almost 95% of the time they will throw the change into his hand and shut the drive thru window without saying a single word back, sometimes without even looking him in the eye.

People say not to judge others, but if you're not thinking ill-thoughts of these people after they exhibit such rude behaviour to you, then you must be a saint because the use of manners and respect is a huge show of one's character and I can't help but think that these people were raised in a damn barn.

It's about that time that everyone, myself included, should really take into consideration the importance of human interaction. You could be served a coffee by the next Bill Gates who happens to be working full time at a coffee shop over the summer to afford tuition. You could be serving a doctor who might one day in the future, save your sick grandfather from a life threatening illness... You never know the people you meet for the first time. You don't know who they are or who they could one day be to you. And you don't NEED to know who they are or who they will be. You may never see them again for the rest of your life, but that doesn't mean it's not important to add a bit of extra time in being polite and respectful to everyone you encounter. ESPECIALLY those who do you no harm nor foul.

Manners are important.. manners matter.